Effortless English. Green Peanut Butter

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Green Peanut Butter text

 

There is a guy. He wants to drink 12 cups of green peanut butter. He needs green peanut butter.
So he goes to Starbucks. He tells the clerk, «I’ll have 12 large cups of green peanut butter».
The clerk says, «We don’t have green peanut butter at Starbucks— we only serve blue peanut
butter».

The guy is upset. He leaves Starbucks. He goes to Greenland. When he gets to Greenland, he
immediately goes to another coffee shop. He tells the clerk, «I’ll have 12 large cups of green
peanut butter». The clerk is surprised and says, «We don’t have green peanut butter in
Greenland…. but, we make the best purple peanut butter in the world. Its to die for!»

The guy orders a cup of purple peanut butter, and it tastes great. However, he still wants green
peanut butter. He asks the clerk, «Where can I find green peanut butter».

The clerks says, «Try Chapel Hill, North Carolina… its famous for its green peanut butter.»
The guy’s excited. He takes the first available flight to Chapel Hill. After landing, he
immediately goes to a coffee shop to look for green peanut butter.

He says to the clerk, «I’ll take 12 cups of green peanut butter. Make sure they are large cups!»
The clerk makes 12 huge cups of green peanut butter. Each cup is one gallon [~4 liters]. The
clerk puts all 12 huge cups of green peanut butter on the table. The guy drinks them all in 20
seconds!

At the table next to him, a woman watches with wide eyes as the guy drinks the green peanut
butter. She tells her friend, «Get a load of that guy, he’s drinking green peanut butter!»
The man’s stomach grows very big. He instantly gains 264 pounds (120 kg)! He smiles to the
women at the next table as he leaves the coffee shop.

He returns home. He is fat and happy because he finally found green peanut butter!

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